It Was A Nice Sleep
Waking up late is the most abhorrent feeling in the world to me. I pride myself in my ability to get up at 5:30am sharply, or 6am if I’m feeling tired. Getting up at 6am still gives me a full hour to get up, shower, shave, do the hair, iron my shirt, get dressed and sit down and have a cup of coffee while watching a bit of the news or checking my email.
Last night I went to bed around 10pm sharp, which is slightly early for me, but I was feeling tired (and more than a little stoned). I had polished off a bowl of popcorn with loads of salt (my fave munchy indulgence) and had finished watching an episode of Thundercats while lying in bed (not at the same time, of course...).
It was a nice sleep – I remember getting up once to relieve my bladder, but it was a half asleep stumble to the toidy and then a stumbling return to my comfy bed. I fell back asleep immediately.
I was woken up with a start. The rain outside was lightly hitting my window but it was enough to wake me up. The alarm clock didn’t go off. It read 6:43. Shit.
I jumped out of bed quickly, as I always do when I’m late – which isn’t as often as you’d think. I went out to the kitchen, filled the kettle with water for my coffee and then placed it on the element. I turned it to 5. Then I began to open the ironing board and placed it on the ground. I pulled out the iron and plugged it in so it would be nice and steamy when I was done my shower.
I started to walk back towards the bathroom through the kitchen but a noise stopped me - a scratching at the window screen behind the couch. I went in for a closer look as the lights were all off. I noticed a small creature trying to claw through the screen, feverishly tugging and scratching to break a hole in it. I lunged at the opened window to close it in time, but the furry black thing had gotten inside. It immediately flew up to the ceiling and hung there - a bat.
I ran to the linen closet to get a towel. When I returned, I grabbed the bat with the towel. I began to open the screen to let it back out. As I did, I noticed five or six other bats hanging from the ceiling of the balcony.
I let the small, toweled bat go out as a large one flew down. I managed to close the screen in time but it continued widening the hole. I tried to slam the window shut. It crawled through and lunged at me. With the towel still in hand, I muffled it and tried to force it back out the hole.
There were then ten to fifteen bats, of increasing size, dangling from the balcony overhang. An enormous one, at least a foot across, fell down and covered the hole with its startling wing span. Its head began squirming through the ever widening hole. I let the medium bat go, and tried to stop the larger one from getting in. With one hand I tried to force it out and tried to close the window with the other.
Four even larger bats glided down and slammed heavily against the glass of my living room window. The large bat had made it nearly half way through as the medium bat flopped around and righted itself, screeching hysterically.
Another massive bat flipped down to the window, cracking the pane of glass. The medium bat dug its sharp teeth into my ankle as the glass shattered.
I yelped...
...as the alarm went off. I woke up with a start and took a few seconds to realize I was dreaming. I looked over at the clock.
5:22. Sweet.
I got out of bed, went out to the kitchen, filled the kettle with water for my coffee and then placed it on the element. I turned it to 5. Then I began to open the ironing board and placed it on the ground. I pulled out the iron and plugged it in so it would be nice and steamy when I was done my shower.
It was a nice sleep – I remember getting up once to relieve my bladder, but it was a half asleep stumble to the toidy and then a stumbling return to my comfy bed. I fell back asleep immediately.
I was woken up with a start. The rain outside was lightly hitting my window but it was enough to wake me up. The alarm clock didn’t go off. It read 6:43. Shit.
I jumped out of bed quickly, as I always do when I’m late – which isn’t as often as you’d think. I went out to the kitchen, filled the kettle with water for my coffee and then placed it on the element. I turned it to 5. Then I began to open the ironing board and placed it on the ground. I pulled out the iron and plugged it in so it would be nice and steamy when I was done my shower.
I started to walk back towards the bathroom through the kitchen but a noise stopped me - a scratching at the window screen behind the couch. I went in for a closer look as the lights were all off. I noticed a small creature trying to claw through the screen, feverishly tugging and scratching to break a hole in it. I lunged at the opened window to close it in time, but the furry black thing had gotten inside. It immediately flew up to the ceiling and hung there - a bat.
I ran to the linen closet to get a towel. When I returned, I grabbed the bat with the towel. I began to open the screen to let it back out. As I did, I noticed five or six other bats hanging from the ceiling of the balcony.
I let the small, toweled bat go out as a large one flew down. I managed to close the screen in time but it continued widening the hole. I tried to slam the window shut. It crawled through and lunged at me. With the towel still in hand, I muffled it and tried to force it back out the hole.
There were then ten to fifteen bats, of increasing size, dangling from the balcony overhang. An enormous one, at least a foot across, fell down and covered the hole with its startling wing span. Its head began squirming through the ever widening hole. I let the medium bat go, and tried to stop the larger one from getting in. With one hand I tried to force it out and tried to close the window with the other.Four even larger bats glided down and slammed heavily against the glass of my living room window. The large bat had made it nearly half way through as the medium bat flopped around and righted itself, screeching hysterically.
Another massive bat flipped down to the window, cracking the pane of glass. The medium bat dug its sharp teeth into my ankle as the glass shattered.
I yelped...
...as the alarm went off. I woke up with a start and took a few seconds to realize I was dreaming. I looked over at the clock.
5:22. Sweet.
I got out of bed, went out to the kitchen, filled the kettle with water for my coffee and then placed it on the element. I turned it to 5. Then I began to open the ironing board and placed it on the ground. I pulled out the iron and plugged it in so it would be nice and steamy when I was done my shower.
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